As mentioned in a previous post, other life priorities have interfered with this blog. After quitting my job in May 2012 due to an extraordinarily toxic environment, I’ve spent the last two years cobbling together consulting assignments and focusing on survival. Writing, composing and even playing music have taken a back seat to more basic human needs for food and shelter.
Classic Maslow hierarchy stuff.
Interestingly enough, I haven’t been stressed out at all. I actually prefer uncertainty to certainty, because then I’m not tied down to anything—all the possibilities remain in play.
Things worked out okay. All the bills were paid on time, we took very little out of savings and we even allowed ourselves some indulgences from time to time. The work was much more fun than what I had been doing, because I decided I only wanted to work with people who shared my values instead of just finding opportunities for a fast buck.
Now things have settled down: I’ve taken a job working for a nonprofit agency focused on helping the ones left behind by our society: the homeless, homeless children, domestic violence victims. I had to give up some freedom, but the opportunity to work for organization completely focused on making a difference instead of making a profit was too good to pass up. I could make a ton more money going to work for a corporation, but I’ve been there, done that, and I could never reconcile the values conflict or the lack of meaningful purpose in a profit-oriented organization. The simple fact that I wake up and look forward to going to work says it all. I don’t think I’ve ever experienced that consistently in my life.
Over the last two years, I’ve also changed many of my habits. I never read or watch the news anymore. I don’t pay attention to politics at all. I’ve come to accept that American society is immune to logic, common sense or compassion, and that only a very few people have any real power in this country. Why get my knickers in a twist about things I have no hope of changing? America will never give up its guns, will never reduce its attachment to the military, will never make the government more efficient and responsive, will never remove the corruption that money brings to politics and political campaigns, will never change the process of reapportionment where politicians set themselves up with virtual lifetime employment. No one who has power is going to listen to me, so why bother pissing away time and energy on stuff I can’t influence?
So, as I re-engage with this blog, I’m not going to write about politics, social change or any other “big issue” that people get all worked up about. I don’t care who has control of Congress or the White House; both the Democrats and Republicans are elitists whose only interest is control and power, and anything either party “achieves” will be argued to death in court for years.
What will I write about? Whatever I feel like! People I know, books I’ve read, music I’ve heard, stories about real life experience, poetry, imaginative bursts . . . the things that really matter.